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Well, yet another birthday gone by, and another day, in general.  Don't you hate having high hopes for a special day, and have it all go to hell on you?  I sure do!

Not much has happened in the course of the day, other than the electric razor and cologne from my family, and the cake I received from Annie and Mike.  So, in the interests of an interesting end of my day, I've decided to put a little philosophy in today's entry (partially to make up for the other day!).

Today, I'd like to talk about friendships, boys and girls.  What's important in them?  What do they mean?  What should they mean?  What are the basic needs of a relationship, in any degree?  (Yes, this is more 'get to know me' stuff)

So far, just from the entries, I've narrowed down some very significant characteristics to look for:

Honesty
Loyalty
Respect
Caring
Understanding

These are the things that I feel I find in MOST of my friendships.  Some in varying degrees, of course.  I can see certain aspects in certain people, though, that define that person.  Here's what I mean:

Mike: Here's Mr Honesty.  Above all.  We have a very distinctive understanding with each other.  No secrets.  We talk about damn near everything.  He's the one I trust with the stuff I can't tell anyone else, and vice-versa.  We both know that there is no such thing as a real secret.

Dan: Loyalty.  No matter what anyone would ever do, he'd never look down on anyone for it.  He's a friend for life, and believes that nothing comes before friendships.  If you're his friend, you are for life.  He'll back you up always.

Ken: Respect.  He's a very respectful, and respectABLE person.  The kind that would 'treat a lady the way a lady should be treated'.  He's just that way, and I hope you understand what I mean.  If not, sorry!

Jeremy: Caring.  He may not be the best at HOW to do it, but he doesn't have a problem showing it.  He reminds me of the fatherly type, that's really behind on what's really going on with the world.  He tries his damnedest to understand everyone and everything, and feels terrible when he can't offer anything to actually HELP the situation.  He's a real fixer.  He likes to fix people's lives, even when they don't want him to!  :)

Christa: Understanding, by a long shot!  As I've said, her and I are almost exactly alike.  We think alike, and we've even been known to understand what the other is thinking, without saying a word.  Just by a facial expression, or a movement or mannerisms.  It's uncanny!

There's only one person that I've ever felt or experienced all these things with, and that's by far my mom.  We've had a really close relationship ever since my marriage fell apart (about 4 or 5 years ago).  She's really great, but on the same note, she's also very sad.  She's an overly caring person, which means she gets stepped on a lot.  I've done my share, I know.  I think the hardest thing for her is the fact that she can't be ALL those things for her family at the same time.  Mom feels this unending desire to be the all-around care-giver to everyone in the family.  Since the family -members- are different as any other people may be, they react differently.  My older sister pities (although I don't see how), my younger sister tolerates, and occasionally abuses (she's a teenager), and I tend to feel stifled.  She's really great though.  I have nothing but love for my mom!

I guess, in closing, I just have to say this.

To have a friend is the easy part.  To ask another to be giving, understanding, and to hold the above-mentioned qualities is easy to find.  Lots of people need friends.

To have them in yourself, however, is the difficult part.  To be giving, understanding, honest, loyal, etc.  Granted, they make you an easy target.  That's true with everyone.  There is a risk to be taken, but the friends that truly believe in your friendship, will do everthing and anything for you.  That's when you know, you're actually IN a friendship, and -not- just a piece of one.

As usual, Life is in the air.........